I was so optimistic about those resolutions, but then we traveled and Jason started making sourdough bread regularly, and really I'm just full of excuses. Also, there are many feet of snow on the ground. All that inspires me to do is huddle inside with hot chocolate and knitting.
The big excuse is, I have lost my drive when it comes to all of this healthy living. It's been gone for awhile and I keep trying unsuccessfully to get it back. When I went to see a weight loss specialist a little more than a year ago he told me that based on my history of weight loss and gain since I was, oh, 13, and the high rate of morbid obesity in my family, he thought maybe we could get me to lose 30 pounds, but probably not more than that. This is a guy who makes money telling people if they follow his program and buy his stuff, they will loss ALL the weight. I told him right off the bat I want to lose 50-60 pounds (which I did before), and he told me 30 was realistic.
Which makes me think, why even bother trying so hard? Let's just eat all the yummy unhealthy foods and sit on our bums if the end result of severely monitoring everything that goes into my mouth and working out almost every day is that I'm still fat.
I know, not a very constructive attitude. But that's where I am.
On the plus side, I went for acupuncture for the first time a little more than a week ago. I think it helped my shoulder a bit, and I know for a fact that it helped some other aches and pains I've been having so I'm willing to keep trying with the shoulder. Jason warned me a couple of weeks ago not to put all of my eggs in the acupuncture basket and I pointed out to him that this is really my last resort. After this, my option is to talk to an orthopedic surgeon and figure out if he or she can do anything for me via surgery. I really don't want surgery.
Today is the first day of Lent, so I've decided to start again with the healthy goals. I replaced my broken Fitbit so I can monitor my steps again, and I'm cutting out sugar, grains and Diet Coke. So far I have an A+ for the day, so, go me.